October again..

Time flies when you have fun..
and I did have fun the last months..
Thinking back to last year.. 
The things that happend to me is a bit odd..

It’s like falling from the tower..
“Severus Please’..     Boom!
Silence..  darkness….  peace.. 

Can’t recall much of the actual events what happened….
Some misty flares of things I did prior to the operation..
After the operation when I was of the intensive care I do remember some impressions though..


Bright light..  voices..  beeps.. 
Could not open  my eyes because of the lights at first.. 
slowly coming to .. I did open my eyes.. 
Tubes and wires everywhere.. 
The moment I opened my eyes a person appeared that removed a tube from my mouth..  and told me all was well, the operation was a success..
and the family was notified of the success.. 

I wanted to say something and took a deep breath.. but then.. PAIN!!..
I could not take a deep breath.. I had to breath shallow… 
I could not talk.. the person next to me, the one that removed the tube, took my hand and told me what’s been done.. and what was the cause of the pain..   that comforted me..  I was given an Oxigen mask  to help me breath better and administered a painkiller..

I can’t recall if this was a male or female, but in my perception it was a angel in a bright lighted room..

I must have fallen asleep again.. maybe due to the painkillers..
what I remember next is I saw my family  and feeling a lot better..
but still my chest hurt..  a lot.. 

Thinking back I know it hurt like hell, but I can’t recall the pain..
Which is a good thing..  it’s proof pain will never last.. and the memory fades in time..

All that remains is the love.. and the good things that’s done for me by people I never seen in my life and I can never repay for doing just that..

yea, some may say.. ‘well it’s their job, they get payed to do just that..’
and yes, you are right.. but still..

They have made that choice to do just that.. I’m thankful  that they did..

“The most noble thing to do is to do something for someone
knowing they can never replay you”..

Yes, I have quoted that one quite often.. even before last years events..

and it is stunning to learn Karma does work.. also in a positive way..
because I’m the one who can say and living proof of ..
that if you do things like this, someday people will do the same to you..

So thank you to everyone who has helped me, comfort me, fought for me to save my life,
stud by me in my moments of pain, Dried my tears when I was crying, lend an ear to listen to my rambles.. 

I love you all
can never repay you!
will love you.. always..


Thank you..